Things I've Dreamt Lately, Week 2
Hey, why not make this a regular feature?
Some of these come from the same dream sequences, but describing the whole bizarre chain of events would be confusing and boring (as John has confirmed many times over). Just the highlights for you, internets.
1. I was eating at a restaurant in Austin with various members of my extended family, admiring the Matterhorn just outside the window. It was a brilliant purple, as mountains are.
2. I hopped on a chairlift only to find that instead of metal, the chair was made of a dozen geese tied together. I got nervous when one goose snapped in half, leaving the chair swinging wildly, and tried to call the chairlift operators on my cell phone, but the line was busy.
3. John, Samson, and I descended three stories into the basement of an old house in search of a public bathroom. I was worried we’d lose Sam because he didn’t have a leash and was the size of a mouse.
4. I stumbled across a tennis team practicing on an indoor basketball court and joined in. The coach was my 7th grade choir teacher.
5. I took a tiny tub of crab paste from some kind of public refrigerator and had to explain to a Dutch girl what it was. In my dream I told her it was kalkoen which, now that I think about it, actually means turkey.
6. Another girl and I were trapped at the end of a maze by a professor from last semester who shall not be named. He took out some of our internal organs and sewed us up into one body, after which we had to run back through the maze/obstacle course to escape. One of the obstacles required us/me to cut a slab of butter into tiny pieces.
7. My mom got mad at me because I spent too long at the grocery store trying to find her tornado medication.
8. Nina Garcia from Project Runway and Dick Cheney lived together in a mansion with their enormous families. I borrowed one of Cheney’s coats (I kind of lived there, too, but nobody liked me) and accidentally tore out a piece of the lining when I was trying to hang it back in the closet. I figured it was time I moved out.
9. I auditioned for an a cappella group at another school and made it. Then I realized I wouldn’t be able to make any of the practices because the school was in Michigan.
10. I went to a Renaissance Festival that was extra-authentic because the participants built all the structures by hand with Renaissance-era tools. As a joke, I set fire to one of the buildings and burned down the whole village. No one laughed.
March 13th, 2009 at 11:23 am
You friggin’ crack me up! I am sitting in painful, boring, mandatory job training and sneaking in some covert web browsing, and you totally just made my day. LOL!
March 19th, 2009 at 7:55 pm
Too funny.
Have you read the book/seen the movie Coraline? Seems some of your dreams are along the lines of this movie with mice, mazes and strange occurrences.
Did you hear that Kinley from project runway (last season 3rd place?) was arrested for attacking her ex-fiance. She threw a bunch of stuff at him including her cat. Her charges included assault with a deadly weapon (ie the cat). Or at least thats what the radio said, I haven’t fact-checked yet.
March 22nd, 2009 at 8:27 pm
@Patty: Oh wow, no, I hadn’t heard that. Crazy. I wasn’t a fan of hers, for sure — too into herself.