The front page article on CNN.com right now is that Mitt Romney is, according to the latest polls, the leading Republican presidential candidate for 2012. Front. Page.

No, okay? Just no.

We get a break. Even in a state the candidates largely ignore, I’m still sick of campaign coverage. If I had my druthers, anyone who actively campaigned for or reported on a presidential election more than six months before Election Day would be tarred and feathered. I know this wild dream of mine is inconceivable these days, but can’t we at least get two years off? A year? A one-year moratorium on election fuss is hardly too grand a request.

Pretty please?

I apologize in advance for the trite yearly-family-newsletter tone of this post. The videos are short, I promise.

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John, when he’s not grokking universe-defining equations, powering up a new radioactive cyclotron beam, or reminding young zoology majors of the difference between speed and velocity for the umpteenth time, has taken to brewing beer in his apartment.

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1. Wikipedia has a category titled “Fictional chameleons and geckos.” There are four; dollars to donuts you can’t name any of the other three. And no, Karma Chameleon didn’t make the cut.

2. Yesterday I passed a Schepps-branded eighteen-wheeler on the freeway. Is there a widely recognized trucker signal for “A steady stream of milk is pouring out the back of your trailer”? I couldn’t think of one, so I drove on. It was milk, after all, not jet fuel, and even if he did find out I don’t imagine there was much he could’ve done at that point.

3. Have you seen the “Caves” segment of Planet Earth? Those people who base-jump hundreds of meters into underground caves are insane. See also, underwater cave divers.

4. Chocolate smoothie with fresh banana? Darn tasty.

My apartment and my school are both fairly close to downtown Houston, so you would think it would take a long time to get from one to the other relative to the distance between them.* Lucky for me, I live off of a limited-access surface street that links directly to I-45, which goes right past UH. My morning commute takes between nine and twelve minutes, depending on how fast the freeway is moving and how I hit the two traffic lights along my route. It’s a pretty sweet deal.

But this morning I was surprised to find the ramp onto 45 closed by a construction crew. I was dumped into downtown with no easy way to get on the freeway. I started driving, through twisty streets and traffic lights, in the general direction of the school. Eventually I landed on 288, which got me to the opposite side of UH from the law school. This morning’s trip, with its ad hoc detour, took twenty-one minutes.

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