I’ve harbored an abiding hatred for Stephen Baldwin ever since he ruined a brilliant television show by appearing on it and generally being an asshat.

I expected to loathe the man until my death (or his, preferably). Obviously I don’t know him personally, but his personality and demeanor get under my skin and, like, poke at my insides with little bitty knives of irksomeness*.

Then today I read this Salon article and discovered that the world is slightly more insane than I’d thought possible. Apparently “Stevie B.” is now a super-fundamentalist born-again Christian. What’s more, he’s taking his “gnarly” skateboarding-themed revivals on the road, targeting teenagers around the country, and *kids are listening to him*. His message is pretty disturbing:

Baldwin preaches that free will is a lie of Satan — we must shut off our brains, he says, and be led by what God tells our hearts. Furthermore, he writes, efforts to end global poverty and violence are just the sort of “stupid arrogance” that incur God’s wrath, which we’ll be feeling any day now in the coming apocalypse.

Stephen mfing Baldwin encouraging kids to stop thinking so hard and drink the Kool-Aid already…this frightens me. “Jesus Psycho” is NOT a title to aspire to, okay? Please, children of the world, don’t listen to the crazy man. Go home and read some books. Watch TV, even, as long as this nutjob isn’t on it.

I hereby propose we add to the D.A.R.E. program a segment entitled “Just Say No to Religious Extremism.” It would recognize that young people are often tempted to experiment with religion and would encourage them to do so only when they’re older and able to make an informed decision, and only in the presence of people they know and trust. Lesson one: If a strange man comes up to you on the street and offers you a “decision card,” you should knee him in the junk, run away, and tell a grown-up. That first step is VERY IMPORTANT.

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* Hat-tip to Dooce. “Hot forks of displeasure,” anyone?

Tags: religion

This entry was posted on Sunday, October 8th, 2006 at 11:37 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.