I’m feeling a bit better this morning, though I woke up late (after 11). I think the less I look around my wreck of a living room, the better off I’ll be.

Last night I had a weird dream. I mean, I have weird dreams every night, but this one was sort of funny, so I thought I’d share.

The first part of the dream wasn’t all that interesting (to anyone but me), but in the second part I was at some sort of camp where our “homework” was to switch into someone else’s body, read a book, and then write a report about it. Whose body did I get? Ann mf-ing Coulter’s. I know, I know. I was freaking out, too, especially when it seemed I might not be able to get back out. I was thinking of cutting her hair short and dyeing it black, but the dream changed before I got around to it.

There was more after that about running a race in slow motion (but I could fly, so that wasn’t too bad) and having to pick a date for the prom, except that all the candidates were dogs. (I don’t think I was a dog, but all the dogs seemed to be dogs sometimes and people other times, so perhaps I was.) Then I met the Chinese emperor and did a flip to show off (I could still fly), which apparently is NOT OKAY in China, so that didn’t go well.

Anyway, the part that sticks with me is the mortifying thought that I might have to spend the rest of my life in Ann Coulter’s body. Explaining to everyone I meet that no, I’m not a venom-spewing, hate-filled Harpy, I just look like one…would get old really quick.

Tags: dreams

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